Kitty Powers’ Matchmaker was initially released back in 2014 for mobile devices and PC, but how does it fare now that it’s released on Xbox One?
The idea is simple: Kitty Powers; a British man in drag, full of innuendos and double entendre, has just hired you to manage her dating agency full of whimsical and bizarre clients. Your goal: Help them find love by helping them overcome certain scenarios on their dates in various restaurants.
When you initially start the game, the glamourous Kitty Powers will show you the ropes and guide you through helping your first client. Once you’ve chosen the type of clientele that will be walking through those doors, whether it’s the geeky type, edgy type or sporty type, you then take them into the ‘hot seat’ to find out more information about their personality. They will tell you what they do for a living, their particular interests and what they’re looking for from a potential match. Once you’ve distinguished who they are, it’s time to whip out your little black book and choose from a list of potential matches. The more in common they have with one another, the more successful the date may be.
To begin with, you only have a choice between three restaurants to send your client and their date to, but more can be unlocked as you progress through this hilarious game. And what’s more, these restaurants are pretty clever and comical with the names. For example, a Jamaican restaurant is called ‘Jerk King’ and a traditional British restaurant is simply ‘The Kings Helmet’. Restaurant choices are put into envelopes, requiring you to follow them as they’re being shuffled. Reason being is that if your clients’ date is somewhat successful, and they take them on a second date, you don’t want to send them to the same restaurant again as this will impact their relationship. Before your client arrives at the restaurant, you have the opportunity to give your client a makeover to closer match what their date requires from them. Again, further improving the chances of it being successful. Now it’s time to send them to the restaurant where the real fun begins…
Throughout the dates, it is key to remembering various aspects such as the weather when your client arrives, the waiter/ waitress appearance and your client and their date’s interests, for you will come across many humorous ‘dating dilemmas’, each pitting you through a short ‘mini-game’ in order to surpass the dilemma. One such dilemma, has your client get a sudden case of an upset stomach, in which you must guess higher or lower to cards that are displayed on screen. If you succeed, the crisis is averted and your clients’ date is none the wiser. However, if you fail, you let off a tremendous amount of gas with your clients’ date asking “What’s that bad smell?”. In which your client can respond with the truth or blame it on the waiter! But be careful, if your client decides to lie to your date at any point, you must spin ‘the wheel of misfortune’ to see if your client gets away with the lie or not.
You can somewhat gauge how successful the date is by the love hearts that appear above their heads throughout, so at the end of the date, once you’ve had your desserts, paid your bill or whatever random crazy scenario ensues (each requiring some sort of mini-game), you have the opportunity of your client asking their date out, go on another date or just be friends. If the date was a complete success, they are officially matched and you are scored on how well the date went for your client. You’ll be granted some reputation, XP and money which is required to upgrade your agency and purchase new restaurants to visit – each adding a new ‘dating dilemma’ to dates that can happen at any restaurant.
Once your date has been matched, you then pick another client (each with their own difficulty) and rinse and repeat the whole process.
Considering this is essentially a dating simulator, it pokes fun at the genre with exceptionally witty and dry British humour that will keep you amused for hours. However, once you have experienced all the scenarios and dating dilemmas this game has to offer, there’s little much else to carry on for except for a quick ‘pick up and play’ situation, as sending a client on a date can be over and done with by the time you’ve had a good stroke of your pussy.
Kitty Powers’ Matchmaker is available to purchase and download from the Xbox Store, priced at £12.39.
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A Hilarious Take On Traditional Dating Sims
A smart-witted dating simulator that takes you through all possible ‘real life’ dilemmas found when dating, only this time you’re in charge of the client. With constant puns and plenty of mini-games to tackle, this is one dating simulator guaranteed not put you down.